5 Reasons Why You Should Love Your Enemies (Even When It Hurts)

Jesus’ command to "love your enemies" (Matthew 5:44) goes against human nature. When someone hurts us, our instinct is revenge, resentment, or avoidance—not love. Yet, Scripture repeatedly calls us to a higher standard, one that reflects God’s heart.

But why? Why should we love those who mistreat us? Here are five biblical reasons to love your enemies, even when it hurts.

1. It Reflects God’s Love Toward You

Romans 5:8 (ESV)

"But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Before we loved God, He loved us—even in our rebellion. When we love our enemies, we mirror the unconditional love God has shown us. We were once His enemies (Colossians 1:21), yet He forgave and redeemed us.

Luke 6:35 (NIV)

"But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked."

Loving our enemies proves we are truly God’s children.

2. It Breaks the Cycle of Hatred

Proverbs 15:1 (ESV)

"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."

Hate fuels more hate, but love disarms conflict. When we respond to evil with kindness, we stop the cycle of retaliation.

Romans 12:20-21 (ESV)

"If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink... Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

By loving our enemies, we refuse to let bitterness control us. Instead, we overcome darkness with light.

3. It Leads to Spiritual Growth

Matthew 5:44-45 (ESV)

"But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven."

Loving those who wrong us stretches our faith. It forces us to rely on God’s strength, not our own. Every act of forgiveness makes us more like Christ.

James 1:2-4 (NIV)

"Consider it pure joy... whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance."

Difficult relationships refine our character. When we choose love over resentment, we grow in patience, humility, and grace.

4. It Opens Doors for God’s Justice

Romans 12:19 (ESV)

"Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’"

When we seek revenge, we take God’s place as judge. But when we trust Him to handle justice, we free ourselves from bitterness.

1 Peter 2:23 (ESV)

"When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly."

Jesus modeled this—He endured the cross, knowing God would vindicate Him. We can do the same.

5. It Witnesses to the Power of the Gospel

John 13:35 (ESV)

"By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."

The world expects retaliation. When we love our enemies, we display a supernatural love that points people to Christ.

Acts 7:60 (ESV)

"And falling to his knees he cried out with a loud voice, ‘Lord, do not hold this sin against them.’ And when he had said this, he fell asleep."

Even as he was being stoned, Stephen prayed for his murderers—just as Jesus did (Luke 23:34). This kind of love shakes hearts and draws people to repentance.

Love Is a Choice, Not a Feeling

Loving enemies doesn’t mean excusing their sin or ignoring boundaries. It means choosing forgiveness, praying for them, and trusting God to heal your heart.

Colossians 3:13 (ESV)

"Bear with each other and forgive one another... as the Lord forgave you."

Every time you choose love over hate, you align with God’s heart. And in doing so, you experience freedom, peace, and the power of Christ’s love working through you.

Will you choose love today?